Back to Basics: What is Street Harassment?
Back to Basics: What is Street Harassment?.
Alexa’s story: Apparently because I don’t find blatant sexual harassment and unwanted touching just hilarious I clearly need a humour transplant. Who knew?
A group of men in the Sunflower Lounge about a year ago thought it was really funny to dance up against me while I stood at the bar with my back to them. I kept looking back with a disgusted expression but they carried on when I turned back. In the end I turned around to the nearest one, pointed in his face and shouted so I could be heard over the music that if he carried on doing what he was doing I would f*cking kill him.
Surprise surprise the response from the little w**kstain? To hold his hands up and say “Oh we’re only having a laugh, where’s your sense of humour?” Apparently because I don’t find blatant sexual harassment and unwanted touching just hilarious I clearly need a humour transplant. Who knew?
Alexa
Kali’s Story:An older man attempted to put cash into the top of my skirt.
In Flares last night, I was dancing with my boyfriend at the bar while we queued. An older man (40+ to my 20-something) attempted to put cash into the top of my skirt.
When I gave him the ‘shocked and disgusted’ look, he tried to tell me it was just a joke. I don’t get the humour. I must be dancing like that in order to arouse him, rather than for my own enjoyment? Was this a form of slut-shaming, ie, “you look like a whore”?.
I kept the shocked and disgusted expression on my face until he turned to face the bar, and acted like he couldn’t see me any more.
Idiot.
Sam’s Story: They didn’t say anything, just sat there with their mouths hanging open, gawping at me
I was walking to the train station yesterday in a world of my own as I was running late and didn’t want to miss my train. It must have been a couple of minutes before I noticed that there was a car driving slowly beside me but I was approaching a junction and just assumed they’d slowed down to turn left. I stopped at the side of the road to wait for them to pass before I crossed but after waiting 30 seconds I realised that the car wasn’t turning. They had stopped next to me and were blocking the junction and the two guys had completely swivelled round in their chairs to stare intently at me. They didn’t say anything, just sat there with their mouths hanging open, gawping at me. Luckily there were other people around and I was able to run down into the train station but I was really shaken up and I dread to think what might have happened if no one else had been around or if there was nowhere I could have got away to.
I decided to ring the local police station and I was really pleased with their response as I’d been a bit worried that they might just dismiss me, seen as they hadn’t got out the car. They offered to send an officer out to me, took my description of the guys and the car and said that they would put out a call to all the on duty officers to look out for the vehicle. I was really glad that I made the decision to call them and I’d encourage anyone who has a similar experience to do the same. Not just because I don’t think people should be able to get away with behaving like that but also because I can’t be the first woman that they have done that to and if anything happened to someone else and I could have done something to help prevent it I’d never be able to forgive myself.
Pinboard Stories Continued…
I was asked if I was a man or a woman:
In a Birmingham Suburb… I was asked by a man in a parked car if I was ‘a man or a woman’. When I replied ‘what’s it to you.’ He said ‘Because there are children about you fucking dickhead’.
‘Oi, you look hot in that skirt, give me your digits’:
In primark today – A young girl in a short skirt was going up the escalator and was called out by a teenage boy ‘Oi, you look hot in that skirt, give me your digits’. Worst part is the jerk was shouting it in front of his little brother!
Quotes from a cyclists life:
Fucking slag; dirty hippy cunt; you need a good slap; nice fanny; will you give me your number? I will pay you’ – That, coupled with added screams to make you jump.
This is not allowed:
A man groped my arse in Snobs with two hands while I went down low. This is not allowed. I told him off.
A policeman catcalled me!:
On Birmingham University campus during Feminist Summer School, a policeman catcalled me and my girlfriend from a police van. Shocking!
Flashed:
I was flashed in broad daylight on my way home from work.
Low cut tops flattering my figure… it doesn’t mean I want to sleep with you
Pinboard Stories
Hello everyone,
I’m sorry it’s taken us a while to put up your stories that you very kindly posted on our Hollaback Birmingham board we brought along to Feminista Summer School our joint launch with Atta Girl at the Island Bar. Thank you so much for sharing your stories with us. The most shocking for me was a lesbian couple getting catcalled by a Policeman in a police car!! Shocking. This and all your other stories are why we created Hollaback! Birmingham. To start a dialogue and shout ok this isn’t okay and we won’t accept it!!
Please find all the stories shared below. Most do not have names or locations as they were scribbled on small pieces of paper.
Harassed on the Way to Collage:
Everyday when walking to and from college I would be verbally harassed by men on the street. They would shout ‘sexy’, ‘slut’, ‘slag’ and then rush away. Every day I felt self concious about what I was wearing, everyday I’d avoid these men’s gaze… STOP STREET HARASSMENT NOW!
Two guys came up from behind me:
On Friday night I was on my way to meet friends for dinner in Newcastle. Two guys came walking up from behind me, jumped in front of me and kept saying ‘hello’, ‘talk to me sexy’, ‘I like you’ and I couldn’t get past.
Waitress Harassment:
A waitress in a pub was just doing her job and collecting glasses when a drunk man tried to dance with her as she passed him. He tried to grab her backside too. She was clearly upset and the manager threw the drunk men out – RESULT!
‘Come on then you batty boy!’:
I was walking along in the sun when five topless blokes walked past and one shouted ‘come on then you batty boy!’ and I felt intimidated
He asked me how much I cost per hour:
Walking home one night a man in his car pulled up to me and whilst masturbating asked me where the massage parlour was…Once I said I didn’t know he asked me how much I cost per hour. I was wearing jeans and a hoodie 
I felt humiliated, scared and dirty:
I was on the bus alone when I was 16. A man sat down next to me (despite the bus being empty). He got really closed and started to masturbate and touched my leg. I scared and moved seats. I felt humiliated, scared and dirty.
I feel intimated and powerless:
Everyday walking to work I am harassed. Cars deep and men (I walk past a building site) shout sexual comments at me. I feel intimated and powerless. It always leaves me feeling angry and frustrated.
Taxi harassment:
Most recent…. running out in gym gear. Black cab driver shouts ‘put come fucking clothes on!’
Carly’s Story: I avoid walking alone in the dark and sometimes feel nervous in the day
I am a 27 year old women and cannot count the incidents of harassment I have had to deal with In Birmingham. The first from around the age of thirteen to today. These range from men shouting out of cars, one car even following me all the way home shouting abuse. I’ve also been followed on 8 or 9 occasions when walking alone. The most recent time this happened was on a busy road, the man was stood on a corner with his hood up, and leered at me as I walked past. I had a feeling that he would follow so I crossed the road to see if he would. He did so I crossed over again and stopped. I was so scared I just stared right at him from across the road, he stared right back. At that point thank god a police car drove past and I flagged it down, the man ran off. This was right outside my flat but have never seen him again. I was also groped by a man on a bus when I was sixteen (when I was sixteen I looked about twelve) The bus was full, but nobody did anything to help, just looked away. I called my dad and then man got off at the next stop (but groped his crotch in my direction as the bus pulled off)
To be honest I avoid walking alone in the dark and sometimes feel nervous in the day, I know I walk around with a look that says “do not try to talk to me” so now get the occasional “cheer up luv, it might never happen” : )
James’ Story and Male Harassment
Hollaback! Birmingham note:
While women also may harass men in public, gender inequality means that the power dynamics at play, frequency of the harassment, and the underlying threat of rape is rarely comparable. For these reasons, Hollaback! Birmingham focuses mostly on men harassing women and LGBTQ harassment. We have however included this post to show that men can also be the victim of gendered harassment – and this is not something we are unaware of or belittling . This is not to disrespect James or his experience. Internationally Hollaback! does not focus on male harassment.
Also, while public harassment motivated by racism, classism or any other types of discrimination are all deplorable forms of street harassment and which men can be the target of and sometimes women perpetrate—is recognized as socially unacceptable behaviour, men’s harassment of women motivated by gender and sexism is not. Instead it is portrayed as complimentary, a joke, or “only” a trivial annoyance. Additionally people tend to blame women for its occurrence based on what they are wearing or what time of day they are in public. These are additional reasons why Hollaback! Birmingham focuses on this type of harassment – but is an ally to all groups and people working to end every type of harassment.
James’ Story
Street harassers eh, barely a weekend goes by without some woman harassing me.
Three weeks ago was a great example (and a regular one); I was stood at the bar when three woman began backing themselves into me. The first bumped me with her behind, turned around, looked me up and down and said ‘oooh, sorry but aren’t you a hot one’ That was her perceived license to grope and stroke my arm; her friend (second woman) giggled and complemented my behind (of all things) as they encircled me a little. My initial response was to frown, shake my head at them and look back to the bar. The third woman then asked what I was buying them to drink to which I replied “do you want three shots of manners?”. They giggled as a group and the arm stroker paused for a moment; however she then said something inane to her friend and moved her hand up and down my back; I moved sideways and asked her sharply whether “she always tried massaging random people in public”.
At that point she did stop stroking my back but must have assumed as a man I wouldn’t actually be all that bothered and she immediately went back to momentarily groping/stroking my arm; by this time the third woman had ordered their drinks and had placed them on the bar; the second gave me a grin and squeezed my behind as she went to grab her sunny beverage. At this point they all had drinks and I saw this as a good opportunity to disengage from them; I angled myself away thanked them for being morons and made a strong effort to act as though I had all attention on the the barmaid.
Shouting and exclaiming my disgust could have worked but women stick together and I have attempted this in the past only to find myself ignored, ganged up on and even started on by random people. A fortnight doesn’t go by without some woman forgetting her social skills and craftily groping my ass as I pass her or she passes me, groups are the worst and grinning at me afterwards just doesn’t make it any better!
Hollaback! Birmingham Note take from Stop Street Harassment
